Five years have passed but Sabeen’s death is still a nightmare
- The Crux
- Apr 24, 2020
- 4 min read
By Yusra Salim
It was a routine day at work and I was covering frenetic activities of the streets of NA-246 near MQM's then Headquarter 90 before 2015 by-election. MQM and PTI were going head-to-head in their campaigns; the infamous fight at Javed Nihari between PTI’s Imran Ismail and MQM’s Kanwar Naveed Jamil was the talk of the town and almost half of the reporters of our team were busy with election related stories on daily basis.
In this chatter around the reporters room, with several ringing landlines and two separate TV sets clashing each other’s volume, I heard my city editor calling my name. ‘Yes Hira, you called me?’ I inquired on which she asked me if I’d be interested in covering a talk on Balochistan at The Second Floor café.
I said I will be happy to do it because being an education reporter I knew the ongoing controversy in detail as the same panel which was to talk at T2F on April 24, 2015 under the title ‘Un-Silencing Balochistan’ was denied a talk at Lahore University of Management Sciences on April 9, 2015.
With the on-going election bandwagon I continued reading on Balochistan and the struggle of Mama Qadeer, Farzana Majeed and Mir Muhammad Ali Talpur to understand their demands and to find the answer of why LUMS didn’t let them talk in their premises.
While reading about protests of LUMS students and other condemnations, I decided to ask Sabeen Mehmud, then director of T2F, about her decision of allowing the panelists to use her space but unfortunately because of my busy schedule I couldn't talk to her beforehand. After realizing the importance of the talk and to find a decent place to sit, I reached the venue earlier.
The talk was to start at 6:30 pm. When I was struggling to find the best seat even after reaching early, I heard someone calling me out, “Hey Yusra! How are you? Good to see you today,” that was Sabeen as always, big smile on her face with her black framed glasses, pixie hair and her signature Kolhapuri chapal. “I am good how are you doing? A nice initiative taken by you when no one was listening to them,” I replied. “I am really glad that people are showing interest in this talk and these people (the panel) are getting the much needed attention, we should at least hear them” she told. I excused her to grab my seat as the session was about to start.
During the whole talk she was there between the people; providing them seats, making space for elderly while asking youngsters to sit on the floor; o make them comfortable she also sat on the floor for a while. There was no room left for the chairs. It was a houseful show.
The talk which had to end in an hour on invitations prolonged to 2.5 hours because of the greatness of the topic itself. While leaving the venue at around 9:20 pm I met Sabeen at the backdoor; I congratulated her for arranging a great show. She said that she felt she is the one who can give voice to those who just want to be heard.
Back then my residence was hardly a 15 min drive, I reached home at 9:35 pm and because the city pages would have gone for printing I texted my city editor that its late and I will be filing the story on this talk next day for the day-after-tomorrow’s edition.
After a tiring day, when I was relaxing in my bed with a movie on TV, hardly five minutes after I had texted my editor, my phone beeped and a fellow reporter sent an image on Whatsapp group of reporters. I still clearly remember the words with Sabeen's photo, ‘T2F director Sabeen Mahmud shot dead’.
I couldn’t program, I froze after reading the text. The only thought came was that just half an hour ago I met her; she was there with her bright smile saying goodbyes to everyone. After few seconds I turned my TV to news, I read tickers saying ‘Defence mein firing ka waqia, do zakhmi ek janbahaq, zakhmi aspatal muntaqil’ no mention of Sabeen or anything.
I called a friend of mine who is a crime reporter to ask about the incident, he said he is not at the spot yet but it is said that a man died there, deep down I prayed he was right but later he confirmed that police confused Sabeen with a man because of her pixie haircut.
In all this while I kept sitting like a statue in front of the TV switching channels because it was unbelievable for me; why would someone kill such a friendly lady that I chatted just a while ago? But it had happened. An era ended with her.
I was a regular visitor at the T2F; either talks to cover or open mics to relax, she was there in that happy place but since Sabeen has gone the place has lost its charm I would say. I still go but not regularly. It has been five years today but I still remember each and everything from that night.
Saad Aziz might have several reasons to kill her either it was her Valentine’s day campaign or the talk on Unsilencing Balochistan but people like me had millions of reasons to let her live.
‘Hope to see you in upcoming events,” were her last words to me while waving me goodbye from the event after which she was shot. I was probably the last journalist, she met before she was silenced for Unsilencing Balochistan.
Yusra Salim
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